Am I Big for Love

People quickly make assumptions about your lifestyle simply by your pants size and are even more quick to offer advice on how to “improve” yourself. I’m a good person with a lot of love to give. It took me a long time to really find myself and stop basing my self-worth on how many looks I got from men. I’m working on my weight for health reasons. My question is this: If I’m so open to finding someone and loving all of him, including his imperfections, do I really have to accept that I’m simply unlovable until I’m thin?

You conclude, “It took me a long time to really find myself and stop basing my self-worth on how many looks I got from men.” I understand that you believe that you’re over your dependency on men’s attentions, but if you truly were, you would not question, “Do I really have to accept that I’m simply unlovable until I’m thin?”

You surmise that “people quickly make assumptions about your lifestyle simply by your pants size…” Well, that’s not entirely true. People quickly make assumptions about everything you do, all the time. In a room of 300 people, you will have 300 different reputations. You can either accept this fact of life or become miserable trying to alter every single person’s perception, which you can’t do anyway.

Girls have some privileges

Girls have some privileges , bec they are girls

Girl were born to have these privileges

But men cant have these kind of privileges as girls

1 girls can get angry anytime anywhere to boy friend or husband

2 girls can be late for dating

3 girls can make their boyfriend or hubby wait for how long time they want

4 girls can ask anything they want their boyfrined or husband to do

5 girls can say anything they want to their boyfriend or hubby

6 girls can be stubborn to their boyfriend or hubby

7 girls can be selfish sometimes to their boyfriend or hubby

8 girls can kiss anytime anywhere they want to their boyfriend or hubby withour permission

9 girls can touch boyfriend or hubby's sausage anytime any where if they want

10 girls can have some male friends and go out with them but without any flirting and ambiguous relationship

What happens when two people fall in love ?

A very interesting story line about loving hearts , how behaviour changes when your get angry and love ?

A saint asked his disciples, Why do we shout in anger? Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?

A saint asked his disciples, 'Why do we shout in anger? Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?
Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, 'Because we lose our calm,
we shout' 'But, why shout when the other person is just next to you? asked the saint.

Isn't it possible to speak to him or her with a soft voice? Why do you shout at a person when you're angry?'

To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other through that great distance.



Then the saint asked, 'What happens when two people fall in love?



















They don't shout at each other but talk softly, why?
Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is very small
The saint continued, 'When they like each other even more, what happens?


They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love.
Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that's all.
That is how close two people are when they love each other.
















When you argue do not let your hearts get distant, do not say words that distance each other more, else a day will come when the distance is so great that you may not find the path to return.

Romantic Idea

10 Commandments of Love

1. Give 100% of yourself at all times.
2. Treat your partner as the unique individual that he/she truly is.
3. Stay connected through your word and actions.
4. Accept change and support growth in both yourself and your partner.
5. Live your love.
6. Share the love, fear, work, and play.
7. Listen to your mate.
8. Honor the subtle wisdom of the heart and listen to the powerful insights of the mind.
9. Do not be a jerk or a nag.
10. Integrate the purity of spiritual love with the passion of physical love and the power of emotional love.

Red red roses that fill the room with its undeniable lovely fragrance, one that’s indeed of beauty and easily allures just anybody around.

A soft candle lit dinner, heart shaped balloons hung where it fits best, chocolates and flowing music all set to fill your senses and allow you to merge on through the night.

The breezy weather outside suitably fits your mood as the wind softly blows the curtains. The serenading wind blows and you can see stars shinning their brightest. And then right beside you, the person you have given your heart to , looks at you with such love in his eyes like he has never loved another, like he has never seen one as beautiful as you.

I pictured this perfect dinner setting with two lovebirds in my mind. I think its pretty romantic and perhaps it would be a less ordinary occasion for any couple. Yet my idea of romance is more than just candle lit dinners, its just not a perfect night of saying ‘I love you’s’ and savoring a single day of happiness. Maybe moments like these are necessary because they give us a lift, an extraordinary feeling and it certainly tells us that sometimes its important to spend quality time together.

Romancing is just not an affair that you keep for the sake of it and not because you are scared to be alone. Its that love in your heart for a person that takes you beyond your horizons and farer than you can imagine.

A perfect romance is loving wholeheartedly without any reservations. It is accepting each other just the way he or she is,it is tolerating each others’ temper and the things you don’t always agree to. It is trusting and being honest.It is having dreams of a life together.

Romancing is doing things for each other and never having to ask the other person to repay you back. My whole idea of romance comes down to love because love is the reason why it all began and it is this driving force that is going to stand the test of time.

Romantic Idea

Red red roses that fill the room with its undeniable lovely fragrance, one that’s indeed of beauty and easily allures just anybody around.

A soft candle lit dinner, heart shaped balloons hung where it fits best, chocolates and flowing music all set to fill your senses and allow you to merge on through the night.

10 Commandments of Love
1. Give 100% of yourself at all times.
2. Treat your partner as the unique individual that he/she truly is.
3. Stay connected through your word and actions.
4. Accept change and support growth in both yourself and your partner.
5. Live your love.
6. Share the love, fear, work, and play.
7. Listen to your mate.
8. Honor the subtle wisdom of the heart and listen to the powerful insights of the mind.
9. Do not be a jerk or a nag.
10. Integrate the purity of spiritual love with the passion of physical love and the power of emotional love.

The breezy weather outside suitably fits your mood as the wind softly blows the curtains. The serenading wind blows and you can see stars shinning their brightest. And then right beside you, the person you have given your heart to , looks at you with such love in his eyes like he has never loved another, like he has never seen one as beautiful as you.
I pictured this perfect dinner setting with two lovebirds in my mind. I think its pretty romantic and perhaps it would be a less ordinary occasion for any couple. Yet my idea of romance is more than just candle lit dinners, its just not a perfect night of saying ‘I love you’s’ and savoring a single day of happiness. Maybe moments like these are necessary because they give us a lift, an extraordinary feeling and it certainly tells us that sometimes its important to spend quality time together.
Romancing is just not an affair that you keep for the sake of it and not because you are scared to be alone. Its that love in your heart for a person that takes you beyond your horizons and farer than you can imagine.
A perfect romance is loving wholeheartedly without any reservations. It is accepting each other just the way he or she is,it is tolerating each others’ temper and the things you don’t always agree to. It is trusting and being honest.It is having dreams of a life together.
Romancing is doing things for each other and never having to ask the other person to repay you back. My whole idea of romance comes down to love because love is the reason why it all began and it is this driving force that is going to stand the test of time.

Romance The Hottie And The Nottie

Paris Hilton The Hottie And The Nottie Trailer - Funny video clips are a click away

Communication in Relationship

One of the most important aspects of a successful relationship is effective communication between both parties. Lack of communication in a relationship can result in hasty decisions that can even lead to separation.
We need to understand the reasons behind communication breakdown and how they can be avoided to ensure a fulfilling relationship.

Sometimes stress of work makes a person withdrawn, reserved and easily irritated. They don’t like to discuss anything with their partners. Financial problems can also be the cause of communication breakdown between two people. When they try to resolve issues, their arguments result in more problems and eventually they stop discussing things. Many couples start hiding their personal problems from each other. They are afraid that if they opened up they will irritate their partner even more and therefore they choose to keep quiet. Remember that lack of communication is the first step towards a failed marriage.

Sometimes mistrust and doubts about your partner’s loyalty result in communication breakdown. You silently start observing their actions and don’t make any effort of discussing your doubts with them. Sometimes when some third party gets involved in two people’s personal matters they make it a point to open up only in front of that third person instead of discussing things between themselves. Always try to resolve your problems yourself.

When you don’t live together for a long time it also results in lack of communication and eventually total breakdown. If your partner has to live somewhere else, make sure you two talk on a regular basis and never let distance come in the way of your love. It’s true that these kinds of relationships are hard to manage but once you have a made a decision you have to stick with it no matter what happens or how physically distant you are.

Birth of the first baby is also sometimes a cause of communication lapse between the partners. The mother has to give more and ore time to the baby and the father has to spend more and more time in the office. As a result they get a chance to talk after a long pause and when that happens there are complaints and disagreements over trivial issues. Sometimes they argue over what the baby needs and how it should be handled and cared for. When things get out of control they stop their communication altogether and become withdrawn.

Reasons behind lack of communication vary from couple to couple, but the important thing is you shouldn’t let these problems come in the way of your relationship. Always talk things out between yourselves before they get worse and never let lack of communication lead to misunderstandings and distrust in any relationship.

Two Best way to build Communication in Relationship

The relative success of every relationship you maintain in life is built and hinges on communication. It is the foundation and bedrock of your bond with other people. Communication: Can it get any more basic than that?

No. And as a result, you may assume that we are all experts in the field of good communication. Of course, such an assumption is false, and even absurd. Because as we well know, the most common relationship predicament, when you boil it down to the essence of the problem, is communication.

We have difficulty with it and submit to almost unmanageable urges that compel us to act in a manner divergent from good relationship behavior. Men are the main offenders in this epidemic. We have that massive male ego to contend with for one, and an almost primordial instinct to "win" at every endeavor we partake in.

Make time for her
That's right; make time. Why the blank stare? You set aside time to watch sports, eat and have sex, don't you? Why should communication with your woman be any different? You have to block off an hour or two for quality time with her, whenever possible. Prioritize it. Make the effort to sit down across from her after a long day to discuss work, friends and your relationship. Heck, you can talk about the weather for all I care. Just talk.

Don't force the topic toward the relationship but do seize the opportunity to mention how well things are going or perhaps bring up areas you need to improve on to give her what she needs. In addition, don't shy away from explaining to her what you need from her. Too many men have a problem with this.

Take the time as you sit together, cook together, travel together, or eat together to voice your dissatisfaction with certain aspects of the relationship. Just do it in a calm fashion, so as not to alarm her. Reassure her that you're happy (if that is the case) with the overall relationship; you just want one or two things to change. Whatever you want to discuss, just make the time for it and make it a joint effort.

Let her know you care
This is where men get bit in the behind. Our competitive nature compels us to try to win every fight, to the point where we forget the one simple tenet about relationship conflict: There is no winner. It's time to stop thinking of every fight as a chance to get the upper hand and use rhetoric until she admits you're right.

That's not the end goal you should want in the long run. Because if it is, your woman is going to resent you before long. Not good. Which brings me to my point: Let her know, no matter how bad, how intense and how passionate the fight, that you care. Amidst all your rage and even when tempers flare, take a deep breath and do something to let her know that when all is said and done, you love her.

Touch her arm, stroke her hair, put your palm to her cheek, or just say the words, "I love you." Of course, some women don't appreciate such gestures in the "heat of battle" and may shove your hand aside or turn their back. Don't take it personally and don't get upset. Just get the message across that you care, even if she isn't ready to make up.

What Every Lovers Should Know About Long Lasting Relationship !

If you are having a relationship right now or you have already got a long relationship but is getting emotionally boring, bad or even sickening down the road, then this will be the most important post you will ever read.
Here is why,
Long lasting relationship,can only describe by two emotional words, in fact no other emotional words even come close and that is…
Surprise And Exciting
Believe it or not, ‘Surprise’ is what every girls desire their love ones’ to give and ‘Exciting’ is what every guys desire their lovely beautiful girls’ to have.

Real Hot !
Listen: Girls love to have surprise, and they truly desire their love ones’ to give them, especially in front of their friends. So, if you always send present to your lovely beautiful girl on her birthday, or valentines day, or any other celebrating day you could possibly think of, it is not going to surprise her anymore, since she already expected something from you.
Go here to continue reading What Every Lovers Should Know About Long Lasting Relationship !

Too Old to Dress Sexy?

A very insteresting Article i came across in MSN ....

It started where many things do for a woman -- looking at my reflection in a dressing room mirror.
I'd never felt like a head-turner, the type who got 'em panting on the construction sites. And that had been okay. Truly.
Well, mostly truly.... So long as it still felt that the only thing holding me back from buying whatever slinky item of clothing struck my fancy was price.
Then I cruised into Ann Taylor Loft and tried on a backless (nearly frontless) sundress that seemed perfect for a hot date. I gave myself a visual once-over, recoiled and let out an Edvard Munch-ian silent scream: My bare shoulders. Were they... Were they -- crepey?!
I flashed back to a 20-year-old memory of an editorial job at a magazine where the boss's fortysomething secretary pranced around in miniskirts and sexy tees which, to my youthful gaze, looked inappropriate for a woman of her years. Was I now she -- over 40 and inappropriate?
Obviously I'm not the only female to face this existential crisis wrapped in a sexy sundress. Says Barbra Williams Cosentino, LCSW, RN, a Forest Hills, New York psychotherapist specializing in boomers' issues, "Many women in this age group define their sense of worth from other people's perceptions of them. If they don't see an appreciative glint in the eye of someone whose gaze lands on them, it's a reminder that older is not considered beautiful in our society, and that's very sad."
This is one, well, wrinkle that in some ways is easier for a non-knockout to handle. I've spent a lifetime telling myself I possess other attributes that make me attractive.

But Carrie Tyler, until recently the undisputed belle of the construction sites, is finding it difficult to cede her crown to a successor. A single mother, the 45-year-old New Jersey-based interior decorator says, "I've worked very hard to stay in shape and have always gotten a lot of positive attention. But recently while walking sandwiched between my 15- and 17-year-old daughters, I noticed men's eyes jumping from one girl to the other, completely passing over me." She admits heavily, "This sounds awful but it was really very upsetting."
Mary Jo Fay, RN, MSN, author of Get Out of Your Boxx and Live the Life You Really Want, puts this feeling into perspective: "Those who were 'hot' back in the day have a much tougher time of it, worrying their looks are leaving them. If they don't have the gorgeous guy on their arm, there must be something wrong with them."
Dating can be an ego knock even when you feel at the top of your game. Fay suggests, "Women over 40 need to switch their focus from hotness to character, emotional connection, and self-worth. Rather than frequenting singles venues, use the 'get a life' method of dating, which means focusing on things you love to do. Your best self shines here and you will turn heads with your charisma."
Charisma is an outgrowth of self-confidence -- and for many women, assuredness finally kicks in at midlife. Devi, a 57-year-old woman confident enough to forgo a last name, says, "I have been a knockout most of my life but didn't know it because I looked at what was wrong with me versus what was right." A designer of flattering clothing for all ages and body types, Devi affirms, "Now that I'm confident in my own skin I feel comfortable telling a gorgeous guy of any age, 'You are so cute!' It's not meant as a come-on but as an appreciation." This carefree approach results in her being appreciated as well; men swarm around Devi like ice cream lovers circling Haagen-Dazs.
Back to me. While I've had a lifetime to become basically Zen with not being gorgeous, I'm the anti-Buddha when it comes to the idea of dressing in a way that feels like resignation to my new "status." And that's okay. Barbra Williams Cosentino says, "It's not about trying to look like a 22-year-old but about wearing what makes you feel comfortable and attractive, even if there's some jiggly skin involved."
I stared and stared and stared into the dressing room mirror, sighing and thinking. Yes, this is a person who gets called "ma'am" more often than feels comfortable. But this is also a person who's holding together pretty well, all things considered. I don't look hot-hot-hot, but I'm still cool. Years of sundresses and bikinis from my past flashed by me. The verdict: Wear bikinis? Nyet. Give up wearing shoulder baring sundresses? Not yet.

Do you have a tough question about dating or relationships? Go here for dating

communication in relationship

19 Steps to Effective Communication

1. See communication as an opportunity to praise, build-up, affirm, heal, support and give positive reinforcement, rather than to correct, criticise, tear down, hurt, wound, lash out at. Praise opens doors to further communication, while criticism shuts them down.

2. Remember that actions speak louder than words; non-verbal communication usually is more powerful than verbal communication. Avoid double messages in which the verbal and the non-verbal messages convey something contradictory. (Credibility gap)

3. Define what is important and stress it; define what is unimportant and de-emphasise or ignore it. Avoid fault-finding.

4. Communicate in ways that show respect for the other person’s worth as a human being. “Avoid statements which begin with the words “You never …” or “I think you …”.

5. Be clear and specific in your communication. Avoid vagueness.

6. Be realistic and reasonable in your statements. Avoid exaggeration and sentences which begin with “You always …”

7. Test all your assumptions verbally by asking if they are accurate. Avoid acting until this is done.

8. Recognize that each event can be seen from different points of view. Avoid assuming that other people see things like you do. (Perception)

9. Recognize that your family members and close friends are experts on you and your behaviour. Avoid the tendency to deny their observations about you – especially if you are not sure.

10. Recognize that disagreement can be a meaningful form of communication. Avoid destructive arguments.

11. Be honest and open about your feelings and viewpoints. Bring up all significant problems even if you are afraid that doing so will disturb another person. Speak the truth in love. Avoid sullen silences.

12. Do not put down and/or manipulate the other person with tactics such as ridicule, interrupting, name-calling, changing the subject, blaming, bugging, sarcasm, criticism, pouting, guilt-inducing, etc. Avoid the one-upmanship game.

13. Be more concerned about how your communication affects others than about what you intended. Avoid getting bitter if you are misunderstood.

14. Accept all feelings and try to understand why others feel and act as they do. Avoid the tendency to say, “you shouldn’t feel like that.”

15. Be tactful considerate and courteous. Avoid taking advantage of the other person’s feelings.

16. Ask questions and listen carefully. Avoid preaching or lecturing.

17. Do not use excuses. Avoid falling for the excuses of others.

18. Speak kindly politely and softly. Avoid nagging yelling or whining.

19. Recognize the value of humour and seriousness. Avoid destructive teasing.

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